Sharks live in salt water because pepper water would make them sneeze
you taste like sunshine
cute gender neutral things to call your s/o:
- chef
- competitor
- judge
- host ted allen
- the chopping block
- *gasp* the woNTONS
me: *sees cute useless kitchen gadget* Add To Cart
alton brown, scratching at my bedroom window like a vampire: no unitaskers in my kitchen
Someone on Chopped: Adds too much truffle oil to their dish
Me, eating cold Spaghetti-O’s straight out of the can: What a fucking idiot